Three Pepper Polenta

Alright dickbones, It's time again for me to bombard your little primate brains with awesome goodness. Today you are going to stare dumbly at pictures and text that demonstrate how to make a reconstituted Polenta with Jalapeno and red and green bell peppers. You will make it. You will consume it. You will fucking love it.

 Three Pepper Polenta

You will need;
 2 Red Bell Peppers
2 Green Bell Peppers
2 Jalapeno Peppers
1 pound Polenta
2 1/2 Cups Vegetable Stock (Separate 1/2 a cup)
2 Tablespoons Vegan Butter
Kosher Salt

First off, you need to reconstitute the Polenta. Since the kind you'll find in stores usually comes in a sausage tube, you'll have to bring it back to its native mushy form. You do this by putting 2 Cups of Vegetable Stock in a pan like this;

(Look! a pan with stuff in it!)

And then putting said Polenta in said pan. Let it simmer on a medium flame (That's usually when you leave the knob dead-centered, dumbass.) and when most of the liquid has cooked off, throw in your vegan butter. Stir it occasionally until it's thickened and creamy, kind of like your midsection. Or, like this;

(This Polenta has sundried tomato in it.)

Now comes the complicated part for those of you too stupid to use a knife properly. And please, if you are kitchen retarded, don't EVER use a mandolin. You need to slice the Bell Peppers and the Jalapenos, and try not to bleed into your Polenta.

At first I was like

But then I was all

Alright meatbags, it's the home stretch. Take your sliced Peppers, and put them in the pan with the Polenta, add the other 1/2 a cup of Vegetable Stock, and then.... wait for it.... Mix it together! Add some Salt if it's needed. Once the concoction has thickened up again, it's ready to eat. You can spead it on a nice slice of toasted Ciabatta bread, throw it over some pasta, or smear it on your chest. In any case, I don't care, because the recipe is over.

DISCLAIMER: What burns going in, burns coming out. And please, never touch your genitals right after handling hot peppers.